The Science of Goals Part 3

DR JOHN DEMARTINI   -   Updated 6 months ago

In this final installment of this three-part presentation on the Science of Goals, Dr John Demartini will show you how to stay inspired while working on your goals, what to do when another priority interferes with your ability to focus on your goal and what specific steps to follow to plan out your goals so that you’re most likely to achieve them.

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DR JOHN DEMARTINI - Updated 6 months ago

 

Staying in the ‘sweet spot’ of inspiration and maximized action in relation to goals

 

Every human being lives by a unique set of priorities or a set of  values that is fingerprint specific to them.

Suppose you set a goal that is congruent and aligned with whatever’s highest on your list of priorities or values. In that case, you are spontaneously inspired from within to do it, intrinsically driven and you won’t need anyone to motivate or remind you to do it.

Think of children who love online gaming – they don’t need parents to remind them to play because they will do it spontaneously.

I’m the most spontaneously inspired when it comes to research, writing and teaching. No one ever has to remind me or motivate me to do any of those three things, but they may have to motivate me to drive a car or cook a meal.

T he actions that are truly deeply meaningful, those that are absolutely ins

 

Staying in the ‘sweet spot’ of inspiration and maximized action in relation to goals

 

Every human being lives by a unique set of priorities or a set of  values that is fingerprint specific to them.

Suppose you set a goal that is congruent and aligned with whatever’s highest on your list of priorities or values. In that case, you are spontaneously inspired from within to do it, intrinsically driven and you won’t need anyone to motivate or remind you to do it.

Think of children who love online gaming – they don’t need parents to remind them to play because they will do it spontaneously.

I’m the most spontaneously inspired when it comes to research, writing and teaching. No one ever has to remind me or motivate me to do any of those three things, but they may have to motivate me to drive a car or cook a meal.

T he actions that are truly deeply meaningful, those that are absolutely inspiring that you can’t wait to get up in the morning and do, if you fill your day with them, those that are of the highest priority, highest value, most meaningful, most inspiring, most fulfilling, that’s the most powerful actions you can take as a self-actualizing individual. 

It is wise to delegate your lower priority tasks to the people who find those tasks most inspiring for them to do so that you’re freed up to get onto the one thing you most love doing. When you do, you’re free. You won’t have to be extrinsically motivated to reach your goals and stay in that “sweet spot”.

 

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A number of years ago I had dinner with a gentleman called Bill Pollock. He founded Drake International – a multibillion-dollar company that is globally impactful.

I’ll never forget him telling me that when he started his business in 1951, that was the last day he worked.

Bill spent at least 10-18 hours a day on his business but didn’t perceive it to be “work” because he was spontaneously inspired to get up each day and do what he loved. His vocation and vacation were the same things.

It doesn’t mean he wasn’t at times distressed – or that I am never distressed, but there are different types of stress.

Distress comes from doing something you feel is a duty, something you ‘have to do, ‘got to do, ‘must’ do, ‘should’ do, ‘ought to do, are ‘supposed to do, or ‘need to do, you’re highly likely to build distress.

However, when you’re doing something you desire to do, choose to do, and love to do, you’re most likely to build  eustress, which is a resilient and beneficial form of stress that boosts your immune system, performance and emotional wellbeing.

In one of my signature seminar programs the  Breakthrough Experience, I teach people who perceive that they are filling their days with actions or tasks that are not inspiring to them that there are two ways they can go about navigating that challenge:

  • Do what you love by delegating lower valued actions.
  • Love what you do by linking those actions or tasks to your highest value or mission.

In other words, learning to prioritize your motor actions or choosing to prioritize your sensory perceptions. It’s a goldmine.

If you know how to do that, then no matter what’s happening, it’s perceived as on the way, not in the way, and you’re more likely to be in the flow instead of in the field of frustrations.

I am certain that it is wise to delegate as much as possible. In fact, I didn’t begin making escalated levels of income until I began delegating – I didn’t make money first and then had the resources to delegate.  I delegated and received more money. It’s an important distinction.

Once I began delegating, I stopped procrastinating, hesitating, and burning myself out.

Instead, I started focusing on what I was spontaneously inspired to do, the highest priority tasks that I couldn’t wait to take action on.

It is wise to set realistic objectives that are high on your values that are not fantasies because otherwise, you’re likely to weigh yourself down, slow down the process, hesitate, and procrastinate.

And then, because you’re not doing something meaningful, you’ll tend to look for immediate gratification by drinking, partying, eating or spending more.  These are not signs of the ‘fulfilling life’ but symptoms that you are not pursuing something deeply meaningful to you.

A great life is something that is inspiring, that has meaning, that’s purposeful, and that is prioritized.

 

When another priority gets in the way

 

Let’s say you meet someone and perceive them to be more intelligent, knowledgeable, educated, or more successful than you, or perhaps that they are more wealthy, fit, more attractive looking or more socially connected than you. You unconsciously put them up on a pedestal. As such, you look up to them and consciously or unconsciously minimize yourself.

Anytime you put somebody above you, you increase the probability of injecting some of their higher  values into your life, thereby clouding the clarity of your own individual highest values and mission in life.

Your mission is an expression of your highest value. Your purpose is an expression of what you value most. It’s what you find most deeply meaningful.

Aristotle called the highest value - the telos, and the study of that was called teleology.

Teleology is the study of meaning and purpose. So, when you’re looking for the most meaningful thing, the most purposeful thing, the most fulfilling thing, the most inspiring thing in your life, I guarantee that it is an expression of what you value most.

If you haven’t gone onto my website and completed the  Demartini Value Determination Process, please take advantage of that of this complimentary and private system. It takes around 30 minutes of your time, and will culminate in your going, “That’s it. That’s what I’m committed to. That’s what my life already demonstrates as being most important to me.”

If your life is not demonstrating actions consistently towards what you SAY is important. What you say is important isn’t actually what’s most important. 

 

You can’t outwardly lie to yourself about what’s important to you without others seeing through the inconsistency. Your life demonstrates what’s most important to you every day. What’s highest on your values is reflected in your perceptions, decisions and actions.

 

My life demonstrates that I’m committed to research, writing, traveling, and teaching. My life demonstrates it every day. You don’t need to outwardly motivate me in these particular actions.

Extrinsic motivation is a symptom and never a solution for self-mastery. Motivation is a symptom that you haven’t been engaged in what’s meaningful because when you’re engaged in something meaningful, you get on and actually do it. You're disciplined, reliable and focused.

So, when you subordinate to some authority out there and inject their values into your life, you’re going to cloud all that clarity of your own intrinsic mission.

The cloudiness makes you uncertain and unfulfilled, and your blood reroutes into your amygdala and your hindbrain. Then you get even more uncertain and unsure of what to do. As such, you tend to give your power away to someone else to make decisions for you.

In the  Breakthrough Experience, we show people how to look at those they admire – a guru, business leader, or anyone they have placed on a pedestal in their life – and go through a specific set of questions:

  • What specific trait, action, or inaction do you perceive this individual displaying or demonstrating that you admire most? Make sure it’s a real physical trait, action, or inaction, something tangible.
  • Go to a moment where and when you perceived yourself displaying or demonstrating the same, or similar specific trait, action, or inaction inside yourself. Do it repeatedly until you are certain that what you see in them is also in you – 100% to the same degree quantitatively and qualitatively. At first, you may think it is not – but don’t stop keep looking again.

As such, you get to own that trait and recognize that you already have it, so you don’t need to envy them, try to be them, or inject their values into your life.

Be first at being you, not second at being someone else. When you subordinate to outer authorities, you undermine your individual unique potential. 

 

People who are pursuing challenges that inspire them that are truly aligned with their own highest values are the ones who have the innovative, creative genius that lead to creative and original ideas with unborrowed visions that impact the world.

 

That’s why it’s so important to  identify your highest values, so you can dissolve distractions, own the traits of the greats, stop subordinating to others, and give yourself permission to stand on the shoulders of giants, not in the shadows of anyone.

Authenticity is still the most magnificent thing you could be expressing. Your body, physiology, psychology, sociology, and everything that goes on in your life, is going to act as a feedback system to try to get you there, to set real goals, in real-time with real objectives, that are deeply meaningful, that are really aligned with what you value most, that you can see in your mind’s eye in the present.

As has been stated for centuries: Those with a vision flourish, and those without a vision perish.

 

Practical steps to achieve your goals

 

The quality of your life is based on the quality of the questions you ask yourself.

The quality questions you would be wise to ask yourself involve taking unconscious information and making it fully conscious.

If you’re aiming for and living in a fantasy, you’re likely conscious of the upsides and unconscious of the downsides of your aim. Therefore, it is wise to become conscious of the downsides thereby becoming more objective and awaken meaning. The mean is the middle ground between the pair of opposites.

In other words, if you’re infatuated with something, you’re not seeing the downsides. If you’re resentful of something, you’re not seeing the upsides. If you’re proud, you’re not seeing your downside. If you’re shamed, you’re not seeing your upsides.

So, suppose you ask questions for strategic planning. In that case, it is wise to look for questions to balance out whatever you’re pursuing to ensure it’s a true objective because objectivity means being neutral and balanced.

For example:

  • What do you absolutely love to do in life?
  • What are the pros and cons of doing it?
  • What obstacles might you run into, and how do you solve them in advance?

Think of Elon Musk and his goal of getting to Mars. He might say, “What obstacles might I run into, and how do I solve them in advance? Okay, well, a fuel issue. Okay. How do we solve that? Radiation issue. How do we solve that? Gravitational landing. How do we solve that?”

If you think about it, Musk took something that NASA had never accomplished – he figured out a way of having a spacecraft come back and be reusable and land again. That was one of the most amazing things to watch the first time. He did it by pre-empting and solving problems, not by having a fantasy without a strategy.

Here are a few more questions:

  • How do you get handsomely paid to do it - so your vocation and vacation will be the same?
  • What are the highest priority actions you can take today to move you one step closer towards that achievement?
  • What worked and what didn’t work today?
  • How can you do it more effectively and efficiently?
  • How did it get you a step closer to your goal no matter what happened today?

This last question is important because it’s all perception. It’s not what happens to you out there but your perception of what happens.

It becomes even more probable that you will achieve your goal if you follow those steps while also breaking down your goal into smaller bite sized pieces.

If you don’t believe you have the knowledge to get the answer, find someone who can help you get there – a coach, mentor, or come to the Breakthrough Experience to help you work towards that objective.

I firmly believe that when the WHY is big enough, the ‘Hows’ tend to take care of themselves.

If you have a big enough reason to do something, you will find the answers, and the people, that synchronize it.

The people, places, things, ideas, and events tend to synchronize in your life when you’re really clear on an objective and have a big enough reason for doing it.

I had a lady in Los Angeles who had just finished the Breakthrough Experience and wanted to ask me one last question before she left. She said, “My business has plateaued for the past three years, and I can’t seem to find a way to get it growing again.”

So I asked her, “What is the most important thing in your life? Your highest value that your life demonstrates?” She replied that it was her daughter.

So I asked her to imagine that her daughter had been kidnapped by the mafia and would only return her child if she doubled her business in 30 days.

I asked her to let me know her ideas as they popped into her brain, and she quickly came up with about five strategies and solutions that she had not yet tried.

As I said to her, you won’t stop when you have a big enough reason for doing it.

That’s why I said earlier, When the WHY is big enough, the HOWs take care of themselves. That’s why it is wise not to waste your time on objectives or goals that aren’t highest on your values and that aren’t truly meaningful objectives.

So make sure that you have real goals and objectives that are truly meaningful to you, that inspire you and that you’re intrinsically driven to achieve. That’s where your highest level of innovation and creativity will come from.

So that’s the key to overcoming that inertia: break it down and start on the first highest priority action step.

Take the time now to identify what is your highest priority action steps or the number one action step you can do today to move one step closer to your goal.

I have a  Master Planning For Life program that I also present that guides you through 2000 questions to create a business plan, financial plan, relationship plan, social leadership plan, physical health and well-being plan, spiritual plan, and family dynamic plan.

As I often say, if you don’t plan, you’ll be living other people’s plans.

If you don’t fill your day with high priority actions that inspire you, it fills up with low priority distractions that don’t.

If you don’t plan your life, don’t take command and don’t get clear in your mind about your mission and actual long-term objectives in life, then you’re less likely to be fulfilled.

Nobody’s going to get up in the morning and dedicate their life to your fulfillment. They’re going to project their values onto you and expect you to live in service to their fulfillment.

Any area of your life you don’t empower, someone’s going to overpower you, and they’re likely to project and you are likely to inject their values. If you’re not inner directed, you’ll end up scattering and confusing yourself and clouding the clarify of your own vision and primary mission.

If you want a clear mind and an inspired life, then ask yourself

  • “What is the highest priority action I can do today to move me one step closer in the goal or objective that I have to serve the planet and humanity?”
  • “How can I do it in a sustainable, fair exchange manner where I’m remunerated for it in such a way that I can delegate to others and liberate myself to do the highest priority things?”

I am certain that when you do the highest priority things, you’re going to produce the most, you’re going to have the most meaning, you’re going you have the greatest business growth. You’re going to feel the most inspired, vital and fulfilled.

 

In Conclusion

 

  • When pursuing a goal, it is wise to determine whether it is a fantasy or an actual objective goal.
  • An actual objective goal results in a balanced neurochemistry. In contrast, a fantasy often results in an unbalanced neurochemistry in the brain.
  • It’s wise to re-adjust any goals that aren’t congruent because the brain just deletes them when it knows they are not achievable because they contradict each other.
  • Everybody has a time and space horizon in which they live. Anytime you live congruently in your highest values, your space and time horizons expand. Anytime you love incongruently and down in lower values and trying to be somebody you’re not, your time and space horizons shrink.
  • It’s amazing what you can get done when breaking a goal down into small increments. Incremental momentum towards a long-term vision that’s well-structured and strategized, that’s within your progressively expanding time horizon, increases the probability of reaching your goals.
  • It’s very powerful once you grasp how little actions make big dreams, and little visions can become huge visions if you just keep doing them.
  • The actions that are truly deeply meaningful, the ones that are absolutely inspiring that you can’t wait to get up in the morning and do, if you fill your day with them, which are the highest priorities, highest values, most meaningful, most inspiring, most fulfilling actions, that’s the most powerful actions you can do as a self-actualizing individual.
  • Anytime you put somebody above you, you increase the probability of injecting some of their  values into your life, thereby clouding the clarity of your own individual highest values and mission in life.
  • If you haven’t gone onto my website and completed the  Demartini Value Determination Process, please take advantage of that free and private complementary system there.

 

If you’d love to learn how to put the principles covered in this blog into action, join me at my 2-day seminar, the Breakthrough Experience, where I’ll introduce you to a powerful self-development process called the Demartini Method.

The Demartini Method is a breakthrough discovery and cutting-edge personal transformation methodology that results in a new perspective and paradigm in thinking and feeling and which helps awaken your authenticity and mastery. 

It is the key methodology incorporated in Demartinian Psychology. The Demartini Method consists of Executive Function Development exercises used strategically to drive the evolution of the brain - from subcortical dominance to prefrontal cortex or executive center dominance. 

It is the culmination of more than five decades of research and studies in numerous disciplines, including physics, philosophy, theology, metaphysics, psychology, astronomy, mathematics, neurology, and physiology. It’s a cognitive process that involves balancing your mathematical equations of perceptions through a continuous thinking and writing action, driving you from your more primitive survival brain (systems 1) dominance to your more advanced thrival self-governing (systems 2) brain dominance.

The Demartini Method results in greater self-governing executive function and thus life mastery.

It is a powerful transformation process used by many leading specialists in the mind mastery field such as psychology, psychiatry, coaching, mentoring, teaching, and holistic healing.

If you’d love to find out more, click here. You can also chat with a member of the Demartini team by booking a call here.

 

Science of Goals Part 1

 

Science of Goals Part 2