READ TIME: 11m
DR JOHN DEMARTINI - Updated 4 months ago
As a Human Behavior Expert, I tend to ask a lot of questions during my travels around the world. One question I often ask groups of people is, "How many of you would love to master your life and be a master of your destiny?" Almost every hand goes up. Then I ask, "How many of you would love to live your dreams, the things you are inspired to go and fulfill?" Again, the majority of hands go up. Next, I ask, "How many of you feel that you are making progress toward that?" Many people raise their hands, indicating they're making progress, but certainly not as many as before.
Here's my story.
My journey towards self-mastery began when I was a teenager.
When I was about 18 years old, I set out to master my life. At first, I had to start by figuring out what self-mastery and life-mastery truly meant.
As a starting point, I decided to break life into seven areas:
- Spiritual: My meaningful purpose or inspired mission for my life.
- Mental: Creating innovative ideas that serve or contribute to people throughout the world and using my mental capacities to the fullest.
- Vocational: Career success, achievement, service through sustainable fair exchange.
- Financial: Financial freedom and independence.
- Familial: Family love and intimacy.
- Social: Social influence and leadership.
- Physical: Wellness, stamina, strength, and well-being.
I used these seven areas to help me identify, clarify, and write down what I was truly inspired to achieve in my life. I'm a firm believer that it is wise to start with what you know right now as a first step in defining your long-term dreams and goals.
My next step was to make sure that my dreams and goals were truly congruent and aligned with my unique set of higher values.
I often speak about how your life demonstrates your values – in fact, if you tell me what your highest values are, I'll tell you where you're headed. If your dream is congruent with your highest values, you have the highest probability of achieving and living your dream. If they are not, you have a lower probability.
It’s for this reason that I encourage people to take advantage of the Demartini Value Determination Process that I’ve made available for free on my website. It will assist you to honestly look at what your life demonstrates as being truly important to you. In other words, It will help you to assess what’s your real dreams, goals and objectives that you are truly committed to accomplishing.
Some of the main reasons why people aren’t living the extraordinary life they dream of is because they’re setting up a fantasy, attempting to inject someone else’s values that they envy and look up to into their own life, not being clear on their own highest values, nor coming up with a strategy or detailed action steps to achieve their goals. Instead, because of their frustration trying to be inauthentic they may be wanting a quick fix or immediate gratification.
My observation is that people who want immediate gratification don't go as far as people who are patient, focused on their long-term vision, and willing to do what it takes to patiently achieve their goals.
For example, some of my personal goals require immense patience, and it's slow, steady, consistent, year-by-year progress towards those objectives. Some goals I achieve quickly, some are medium-term, and some are long-term.
I believe that defining your dream and ensuring that it's congruent with what you value most is a vital component on your journey to mastering your life. Why? Because you tend to spontaneously act in your highest values. Conversely, you are more likely to need external motivation to get you to do things that are lower in your hierarchy of values.
So, if you're not setting goals that are truly congruent with what you value most, you're more likely to need extrinsic motivation, reminders, and incentives to get you to do what you say is important.
As I often say, if what you say is important, and you're not acting on it, it's not that important to you at the moment.
It is wiser to be honest about what's truly important and valuable to you right now.
I believe in prioritizing your life, ensuring that your goals are truly congruent with your highest values, and carefully strategizing to mitigate potential risks. Developing real strategies and action steps is crucial to achieving your desired outcomes.
In my signature two-day signature Breakthrough Experience program that I teach almost every weekend, I teach people how to set goals and objectives that are truly important and not just fleeting whims. Why? Because if something is truly important to you, you tend to be more willing to do whatever it takes to get it.
As I often say, when your 'why' is big enough, the 'how' takes care of itself. So, wasting your time on trivial matters won’t likely bring you fulfillment. Instead, breaking down large projects into smaller more manageable bites and being realistic about how you’re going to achieve them, is key.
I recently watched an interview with Elon Musk where he revealed that he typically works between eighty to a hundred twenty hours a week. I often work that number of hours per week, it's pretty standard for me. That doesn’t mean that it’s wise for you to do that, but my experience tells me that the people who put the extra hours in get the extra results.
You may have heard the phrase, "Time x intensity gives results." The more intensely you focus on something, the faster you tend to get a result. I'm a firm believer that if you work twice as hard and smart as somebody else, you’ll get there in half the time. I did that all the way through school, and I've done that ever since. I put in the hours to get what I dream about, and that's how I achieve it.
There are seven high quality questions that I discuss in the Breakthrough Experience to help you master your life.
The first question is, "What is it I would absolutely love to do in life?" In my case, I want to travel the world and teach, research, and write.
The next question is, "How can I get handsomely and beautifully paid to do that?" Note that this is very different from asking, "How can I afford to do that?" which is more likely to lead you into debt. By asking, "How can I get handsomely and beautifully paid to do it?", you're more likely to find a way to do what you love and serve others in a manner that they are willing to pay you for it.
The third question is, "What are the highest priority actions I can take today to move me in the direction of what I say I would love to do?" For me, this meant figuring out actions that would help me travel the world and teach, research, and write and get handsomely paid for it. Slowly but surely, I developed a strategy and built momentum.
The fourth question is, "What are the obstacles I might run into, and how can I solve them in advance?" Many people live by hindsight; they focus only on fantasy instead of setting true and meaningful objectives and mitigating risks. As such, they tend to avoid thinking about potential negatives, which isn’t a wise approach when learning to master your life. The result is that they are more likely to be unprepared and blindsided by things they've overlooked because they’re reacting instead of being proactive. It is wiser to anticipate obstacles and prepare solutions in advance.
The fifth and sixth question is, "What worked, what didn't work?" and "How did whatever happened to me today serve me?" If you constantly ask how everything that happens is helping you achieve your dream, you are more likely to see everything as being ON the way, not IN the way. As such, you are less likely to live in resistance or fear.
If you accumulate perceptions of experiences or events that seem to block your path, you'll tend to live in anxiety and fear. But if you’re wise, you’ll hold yourself accountable and ask the 7th question, "How did whatever happen to me today help me move one step closer towards my objective?"
Every day, review what worked and what didn't, and how you can do it more effectively tomorrow. If you do, you'll be more likely to achieve your goals.
This is all part of a manifestation process I teach in the Breakthrough Experience because I believe that clarifying your purpose is a crucial step in the process of life mastery.
It’s why I teach: Dominate your thoughts with your purpose, especially if it's truly congruent with your highest values because it will spontaneously emerge in your thinking. In my case, I don't need to be reminded or motivated to think about traveling the world to teach; I love doing it, and it's what I think about every day.
So, find the thing that you don't need to be motivated to do, something that is spontaneously inspiring for you to pursue. Then find a way to get handsomely paid for doing it, which means taking on the accountability and responsibility to do it in a way that serves people.
If you don’t have some form of philanthropic goal of making a difference in the world, don't expect to achieve your most meaningful and fulfilling dreams. It requires being of service to others, contributing in a way that makes them feel fulfilled as well as you.
If you help other people get what they want in life, you will tend to get what you want. And, if you can't wait to get up in the morning and be of service to people, people will likely not be able to wait to receive your service.
I’m sure that, like me, you don't want to have regrets at the end of your life, like those described in Bronnie Ware's Five Regrets of the Dying. Instead, you likely want to live an inspired life by prioritizing what is truly important. That's why in the Breakthrough Experience, I teach people how to define their highest values, prioritize their lifestyle, dissolve all the emotional baggage that they perceive is in the way of them living their dreams, and just get on with it.
You can master your life and live your dreams, but it takes work. But I will not sell you a fantasy that it's going to be an overnight achievement.
When I look at the things I've set out to do, it's mostly been slow and methodical. Patience gets you there. For example, learning to speak publicly was a patient process. Learning to read was a patient process, as was figuring out how to travel and finding ways to make it work financially took time.
If it's really important to you, you are less likely to give up. When you have a 'no turning back' objective, there tends to be no obstacle you cannot overcome, no excuses. You just move forward. And when you get to that point, you’ll likely find that you achieve your dream. But that only happens when you're operating within your highest values.
That's why I help people in the Breakthrough Experience to identify their highest values and set goals that are congruent with those values. When you live by priority and operate within your highest values, your executive center comes online, and you start to strategize. If you can see it in your mind's eye, strategize effectively, and be willing to refine your strategy based on feedback, you'll most likely achieve your goals.
To Sum Up
I am certain that you deserve to live the life you dream of – an extraordinary life where you wake up each morning inspired and vitalized about the day ahead, and a life where you live by priority, congruently with your highest values. In other words, a life where you are a master of your life and master of your destiny.
Your life demonstrates your hierarchy of values.
If your dream is congruent with your highest values you have a high probability of achieving and living your dream.
You can master your life and live your dream, but it requires effort. This isn't about seeking immediate gratification or looking for shortcuts. True accomplishment comes from putting in the work and taking high-priority actions that consistently move you in the direction of your dreams.
Don't shy away from putting in the necessary effort. Work for what you want, and you will achieve what you love. That's why I hardly ever take breaks - I don't want to be distracted by low-priority matters. I want to keep focusing on what I am inspired to do. If you fill your day with what inspires you, it won't tend to fill up with what doesn't.
When your 'why' is big enough, the 'how' takes care of itself.
Time x intensity gives results. The more intensity you focus on something, the faster you tend to get a result.
If you found value in reading this article, imagine what effect spending over 24 hours with me at the Breakthrough Experience could have on your life. I am certain that I can help you live your dreams, master your life, and transform your future.
Are you ready for the NEXT STEP?
If you’re seriously committed to your own growth, if you’re ready to make a change now and you’d love some help doing so, then book a FREE Discovery call with a member of the Demartini Team so we can take you through your mini power assessment session.
You’ll come away with a 3-step action plan and the foundation to empower your life.
Book Your TICKET for Dr Demartini's Breakthrough Experience
If you’re ready to go inwards and do the work that will clear your blockages, clarify your vision and balance your mind, then you’ve found the perfect place to start with Dr Demartini at the Breakthrough Experience.
In 2 days you’ll learn how to solve any issue you are facing, transform any emotion and reset the course of your life for greater achievement and fulfillment.
You’ll unlock your true potential and lay the groundwork to empower all 7 areas of your life.
Get ready to take your life to a whole new level of meaning and purpose.
Today is the day you step into your power and value yourself by investing in your inspired life when you sign up for Dr Demartini’s signature seminar the Breakthrough Experience:
Loading...