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DR JOHN DEMARTINI - Updated 3 years ago
When it comes to New Year's Resolutions, many people set lofty goals on the 1st of January to quit smoking, lose weight or to work harder, but they find themselves puffing on a cigarette, eating a full block of chocolate and complaining about their co-workers just a week later.
It's wise to set goals in line with the things you really value or you'll falter within weeks – or even days.
In my program, The Breakthrough Experience, we determine your highest values. These values are what you need as the basis for your yearly goals.
For example if you want to exercise more but health isn't actually one of your real priorities, your chances of success are low. On the other hand if being a good parent is one of your highest values, a resolution to spend more time with your kids has a much better chance of success.
Our values arise from our voids.
What you perceive as most missing in your life often becomes what you perceive as most important.
The more important a value is; the higher it will be on your hierarchy of values and the more discipline and order you will have around it.
The less important a value is; the lower it will be on your hierarchy of values and the less discipline and more disorder you will have associated with it.
Understanding you own true values will help you to set up New Year's Resolutions that you'll be able to keep throughout the year.
So how do you determine what our highest values are?
The answer already surrounds you. If you look closely to see what you fill your spaces with, what you always have time for, what energizes you, what you spend your money on, what you think and talk about, and where we are you most organized and disciplined in, you will see what is truly most important to you.
To determine your values, click here: Determine Your Values Online
Here are some tips for keeping your New Year's Resolutions this year:
1. Determine what goals worked last year and which ones didn't
Before setting this year's resolutions, evaluate which ones you kept last year and which ones you didn't.
Your life demonstrates your true highest values or priorities and if the newly desired action is truly all that important you would probably already have done it.
Your daily actions speak louder than your words.
Get clear on what goals of last year were not aligned with your highest values and write down New Years Resolutions that are aligned with your highest values.
2. See how achieving this New Year's Resolutions will serve you
When your ‘why’ is big enough, your ‘HOWs’ will take care of themselves.
When you can see how achieving this specific new year's resolution will help you or serve in what is already important to you, you will automatically want to work on this goal.
To link what you would love do, to what you already value and how it serves you, will increase the probability of taking action.
Compile a list of how you'll benefit from achieving these goals this year. Repeatedly ask yourself: "How could achieving this new desired goal help me fulfill my highest values?"
3. Build momentum
Only set goals that are truly important to you or you will erode your self-worth and discourage yourself to set future goals.
Doing what you have a long-term track record of already doing, will increase your self-worth and therefor inspire you to set more goals.
Achieving a goal that is important to you, inspires you to achieve greater things.
Set resolutions that are truly demonstrated to be of high value; and do them in incremental manners and build more lasting momentum. Then piggy banks become biggy banks.
4. When you fall back to old habits
If you fail to keep a resolution, you probably still see the old habit as more effective.
Every decision you make and action you take is based upon the perception of what you think will give you more of an advantage over a disadvantage.
The more pleasure than pain, the more reward than risk. When you see how the new desired action will give you as many rewards; you will more likely turn to the new desired action, instead of falling back to old habits.
So if you are doing something other than what you intended, ask yourself:
"How does fulfilling this new intended action help or serve my highest values?"
Set clear goals that are congruent with what your life demonstrates. This will give you the greatest probability of achieving them and thus keep these New Year's Resolutions throughout the year!
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