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How to Get Through to Your Kids



by Dr John Demartini


Teachers and parents tend to teach children what they think is most important and the art of teaching is also the art of selling. They are not going to ‘sell' a love of learning unless they honor the child's individual values. So knowing a child's values becomes useful in mastering the art of awakening a desire to learn a specific subject. The trick is to link their highest values, say it's soccer, to the subjects in the class, making the connection between how understanding a subject likes mathematics will improve their game.


Here is an important question.  Do we as teachers and parents have enough value on the child to take the time to link the child's classes to their values?  When children don't see how the subject they are learning in class is helping them in the areas that they see important, they shut down and lose their focus. When something is low on a child's values, they require outside motivation in order to keep focused; without the motivation, they procrastinate, hesitate and become distracted.


Yet that is not an example of their capability. Have you ever wondered how a supposed ADD / ADHD child who enjoys Chess or video games can sit still, undisturbed, totally immersed and focused for hours? Why? Because they have a high value on it.


Unless helping the child become inspired about education is high enough on our values, we won't take the time and have the discipline ourselves to do what it takes to see the connections between their values and their classes. When we see the connections for ourselves, we are able to assist the child see the connections. This is the most effective way of assisting children become inspired by a subject they were not previously interested to learn.


In order to discover a child's highest values, all we need to do is to observe what their lives demonstrate them to be, look at what they talk about, what they spend their time doing, where they have energy, where they have order and what goals they set themselves. 


I have never met a child or any person who didn't want to learn and grow. It is inherent in the very core of our nature. Wisdom is to honor every child for who they are as they are. Take the time to look for their unique genius as when you see it you are able to help them see it for themselves. Help the child to link what they currently see important with areas that they are not inspired to learn and you will assist their growth in the most effective and efficient manner.
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