DR JOHN DEMARTINI - Updated 1 year ago
When it comes to mastering and empowering all areas of your life, there are seven divisions that I refer to:
- Spiritual: Your meaningful purpose or inspired mission for your life
- Mental: Creating innovative ideas that contribute to the world and using your mental capacities to the fullest
- Vocational: Career success, achievement, service
- Financial: Financial freedom/independence
- Familial: Family love and intimacy
- Social: Social influence and leadership
- Physical: Health, stamina, strength, and well-being
Any of these seven areas that you don’t empower, others will tend to overpower.
- If you don’t empower yourself in your mental capacities, you’ll likely be told what to think.
- If you don’t empower yourself in business, you’ll be told what to do.
- If you don’t empower yourself in finance, you’ll be told what you’re worth.
- If you don’t empower yourself in relationships, you may end up doing or agreeing to things you don’t want to do.
- If you don’t empower yourself socially, you’ll be told what propaganda to believe.
- If you don’t empower yourself physically, you’ll be told what drugs to take or organs to remove.
- If you don’t empower yourself spiritually, you may be told some antiquated dogma that may not be rational or self-empowering.
Any of these seven areas of life that you passively don’t empower will leave you vulnerable to becoming overpowered by more assertive others.
Plus, the more areas of your life you don’t empower, the more likely you are to feel like a victim of your history instead of a master of your destiny; that the world is controlling you; and that you are living by duty and not by design.
In my opinion, that’s not the wisest way to live.
I believe it’s wiser to empower all seven areas of your life.
Click below for the video of this article. ↓
The significance of your unique set of values or priorities when it comes to empowering your life
Every human being lives according to a unique set of values, priorities, or hierarchy of needs.
Values are like fingerprints. No two people have the same set of values.
Whatever is highest on your unique list of values or priorities is the area in which you are most disciplined and inspired from within to do without needing external motivation. It’s also where you are most likely to have the most order and organization in your life.
Your unique hierarchy of values also reflects how you make decisions and act in the world. You are most likely to attend first to those things which you perceive support your values most.
What’s highest on your hierarchy of values, or your highest priorities, are the things you’ll have a high level of certainty about. You’ll believe you “can” in the areas of your highest values. You’ll have more specialized knowledge, be more organized and reliable in this area. You are likely to be more extroverted when it comes to the areas that are highest on your values.
When you set goals or objectives and align them to your highest values, you increase the probability of doing and achieving them. You will also tend to believe that you can achieve your goals or objectives and awaken leadership skills in these areas.
When you take actions that fulfill lower values further down the list of your individual values you will tend to experience more frustration, procrastination, hesitation and disorder. These will be the actions or goals that you perceive that you don’t know as much about or can’t do, and you are likely to be more introverted when it comes to these actions. The goals aligned with your lowest values are areas you will also tend to procrastinate and frustrate in and need external motivation to do.
Identifying your unique values are key to empowering all seven areas of your life.
Empowering yourself mentally
Once you have identified your unique set of highest values and start living more congruently with what’s most important to you, you are more likely to live by priority, fill your day with things that are deeply meaningful, and awaken your greatest mental capacities.
People who live by priority tend to achieve more than people who don’t.
Suppose you don’t fill your day with high priority actions that inspire you. In that case, your day will likely fill up with low priority distractions that don’t.
When you fill your day with the highest priority, the pulvinar nuclei in the thalamus, which is just underneath your cortex, filters all your sensory information so that you can selectively perceive in the world in a way that allows you to maximize your awareness, information, and clarity of intention. So, living by your highest priority will help you maximize your awareness and filter your sensory reality according to what is most valuable to you.
By identifying what’s most important to you and prioritizing your daily actions accordingly, you maximize your awareness and your influence.
Anyone living congruently with their highest values automatically exemplifies a more inspired life - their self-worth goes up, their confidence goes up, and their leadership skills go up. So, from a social perspective, you’re automatically helping you express your leadership role by living congruently with what you value most.
Action Step to Empower Yourself Mentally:
“ How specifically is learning this information, content, or topic helping me fulfill what I value most?”
In this way, you can maximize your absorption, retention, and utilization of that information.
As an example, I’ve gone into schools and helped young individuals who were having difficulty and who were uninspired or engaged in their classes, and asked them: “How is this class helping you fulfill what’s most meaningful to you?” If students can’t see the value, they are highly likely to disengage and tune it out. However, once they could answer the question and make multiple and meaningful connections between that particular class and their highest value, they were far more engaged and attentive.
Asking the question, “How specifically is learning whatever I’m learning going to help me fulfill what I value most?” will also increase your capacity to absorb that information into your long-term memory instead of short-term memory. As such, you are far more likely to retain it and use it going forwards.
Empowering yourself in business
I have yet to meet someone who goes to work for the sake of the business. People are most likely to go to work to attempt to fulfill what they value most.
If you can’t see how your job is helping you get what you want, you’re likely to become disengaged, procrastinate and maybe even resign.
Like most people, I’m sure you want to know that what you’re doing in your job is meaningful and inspiring, makes a difference to other people, fulfills other people’s highest values, and fulfills your highest values.
Action Step to Empower Yourself in Business:
“ If parts of my job are not inspiring, how is the part that is less inspiring helping me fulfill what I’m committed to and how is it benefiting me in the area that is most important to me?”
When you see your job as helping you fulfill what you’d love to achieve in life, you’ll likely feel more inspired by your work. And when you’re doing work that’s meaningful, you’re more likely to be philanthropic and service-oriented and more likely to grow opportunities in business.
If you don’t see your job as benefitting your highest values, you’ll tend to feel dissociated and want to escape it.
Once you can connect your work and what is most important to you, you will be more engaged, and your or your company’s business will likely flourish. If you get other people to do the same, they’ll likely become more productive. If you’re in a job, working for somebody else, you’ll be more inspired by it. And why would you want to go through life and not be inspired by your life?
When you communicate with customers, employees, bosses, or colleagues, it may also be valuable to know that they live with a unique set of values. If you can communicate what you value in terms of what they value most, you’ll tend to get less resistance and less frustration and more results.
For this reason, knowing both your highest values and other people’s highest values is crucial to mastering your life and becoming engaging and inspiring in your career.
If you lead people and communicate in their highest values, not only are they likely to be more engaged, but they will also tend to be more inspired to do what you want to delegate, which then frees you up to perform your highest priority actions each day.
Empowering yourself financially
The hierarchy of your values dictates your financial destiny.
If you don’t have a value on wealth building, you’re not likely to ever build wealth and will tend to live day-to-day and month-to-month.
Unless you have a value on buying assets and taking a portion of what you earn and putting it away where it starts to earn passive income for you, you’re likely to spend your life working for money instead of having it work for you.
I often tell people that money won’t stay with you unless you have a value on wealth building or asset accumulation.
Money circulates through the economy from those who value it least to those who value it most.
If you don’t have a value on wealth building, you’re not likely to ever build vast wealth.
Should you, however, have a value on wealth building, you’ll likely take a portion of your earnings and invest it into an asset, for example, stocks in a company or real estate rental holdings. The more you do, the more passive income you’ll have, and the more able you’ll be to work because you love what you do.
Action Step to Empower Yourself Financially:
“ How specifically is doing the action steps proven to build financial resources going to help me fulfill what is most meaningful to me? How’s it going to help me in my career, education, family or in the area that’s most important to me?”
Therefore, it is wise to empower this area of your life to lessen the likelihood of being overpowered in it and being told what you need to do with your money.
Empowering yourself in relationships
People want to be loved and appreciated for who they are, and who they are is an expression of what they value most. Just as who you are is an expression of what you value most. If your highest value is your children, you’ll call yourself a mother. If your highest value is business, you’ll call yourself an entrepreneur.
Your identity revolves around your highest value, and your most authentic identity revolves around what you want to be loved for.
Action Step to Empower Yourself in Relationships:
“ How is what my partner is dedicated to doing, helping me fulfill what I’m dedicated to doing, and how is what I’m dedicated to, helping them fulfill what they’re dedicated to?”
This practice allows you to have a dialogue of communication instead of alternating monologues. When they’re talking down to you or you’re talking down to them, one half of you isn’t listening – alternating monologue. By communicating what you value most in terms of what they value most, you are most likely to help them get what they want in life and for them to help you get what you want to get in life.
So, the mastery and empowerment of relationships are essentially about knowing how to communicate what’s inspiring to you in terms of what’s inspiring to them. I am certain that this form of mastery is worth the time spent.
Empowering yourself socially
People automatically rise in power when they’re doing something they love and it leads them to become excellent at what they are doing. They are likely to become well-known in that area, build momentum, awaken their leadership role, and it’s the path to leaving a legacy in the world.
I am certain that you have a leader inside you. When you live by your highest values instead of your lower ones, you awaken your natural born inner leader. In other words, leadership is an emergent function of living congruently with what is truly meaningful to you.
Action Step to Empower Yourself Socially:
Mary Kay Ash, founder of Mary Kay Cosmetics taught me many years ago that it is wise to ask:
“What’s the highest priority action I can do today to help me fulfill my mission and stick to my priorities?”
When you live by priority, you’re most likely to feel on top of the world, become more resilient and adaptable, feel more energized, become innovative and creative, and expand your space and time horizons. Hence, you begin to permit yourself to play on a bigger scale in life.
Empowering yourself physically
When you live congruently with your highest values, your blood glucose and oxygen go into the forebrain and activate the executive center, which is more objective and neutral instead of highly polarized, emotional, subjective and biased like you are when you’re operating in your lower or inner areas of your brain. So you are more likely to be resilient and adaptable to anything that happens.
As a result, you’ll be less likely to fear the loss of things you want or the gain of things you don’t because you’ll be more neutral, objective and balanced.
I believe that when you’re doing what you love and are grateful for life; are inspired by a vision and enthusiastically working on it; are certain about where you’re going with clarity and are on purpose, and present with what you’re doing; those are the great healers of life. Your physiology will also rally if you live in this way.
If you stop and think about it, most of the symptoms of your body are simply feedback responses to help get you back to living by priority and congruently with your highest values. It’s one of the reasons why I teach the Demartini Method in my two-day Breakthrough Experience program – to help you neutralize any distractions, impulses and instincts, so you don’t carry emotional baggage. As you balance your mind and heal emotionally, your physiology is transformed as a result.
People often ask me where I get my energy from. It’s simple – I live congruently according to what I value most and clear any baggage that accumulates from expecting myself to live in other people’s values or expecting others to live in my values.
In my opinion, that’s where most of the illness promoting chaos comes from living with futility instead of utility.
When you have a sustainable, fair exchange, live with equanimity and authenticity in yourself, and have equity between you and others, you’re most likely to be in your flow and inspired by your life. This initiates eustress, not distress and wellness not illness.
Empowering yourself spiritually
I don’t personally believe that spirituality is in a stereotypical box, but instead, that spirituality comes from empowering any or all of the seven areas of your life.
Every human being has a unique set of values. Whatever’s your highest value that inspires you, as far as I’m concerned, that could be your spiritual path.
It is wise to avoid placing your idea of spirituality into a rigid box because that judgment can block your heart and keep you from being inspired by what’s deeply meaningful to you.
I believe that if you live in accordance with your highest values and ask quality questions, you can empower all seven of those areas of life.
I have spent 49 years doing whatever I can to help people do that and am certain that there’s a science behind it, which I have partly shared above and what I teach in far more detail in the Breakthrough Experience.
I have also learned that:
- Living by duty all your life is the least inspiring life path and subordinating to the crowd or the herd and not being heard will likely lead you to a life of deep frustration and unfulfillment.
- You would love to make a difference and do something extraordinary in the world. Being true to yourself and living by what is truly most valuable or priority is the key.
- The magnificence of who you are is far greater than any of the fantasies you might impose on yourself. Trying to live subordinating to outside traditions, conventions and belief systems that aren’t truly authentic to you is a path of unfulfillment.
- You want to permit yourself to shine, not shrink by being first at being you and not second at being others.
If you haven’t already determined your highest values, I would love you to go through the FREE Value Determination Process on my website.
Once you identify what’s most meaningful to you, you can begin structuring your life so that you see life as being on the way, not in the way; are inspired by your life instead of de-spired and frustrated; and are living authentically.
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You’ll come away with a 3-step action plan and the foundation to empower your life.
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